Act Like a Dad

1 Thessalonians 2:10-12

It’s Father’s Day and I normally don’t do Father’s Day messages because most men, when their wives ask what they want to do for Father’s Day, say “Not go to church!” So, I am glad for every man here today to hear this message and I pray that others who are not here would hear this message later as well. Every man listening to me has the opportunity to Act Like a Dad.
 
Men, the lesson today is for you whether your children are 4 or 40… whether they are biological children or children God has placed in your life, whether they are physical children or spiritual children. Every man in this room has the opportunity to Act Like a Dad and we need to take hold of that opportunity.

Every father can still have a godly impact on their children’s lives (no matter their age) and every man has the opportunity to act like a dad in someone’s life around them. They can see Christ in you starting today, if never before.

Men, we are called to have a great and godly influence in our children’s lives. We are called to “Act like a Dad.”

Before we get started, let me say first of all, one of the single greatest blessings in my life is that my son is a great, godly dad and both my daughters married great, godly dads and I literally thank God for that every single night.

Next, I know many dads (myself included) live with regrets from the past. Here is my encouragement to each one of us.

1). Man up and act like a dad
2). Get a good hold on what Paul is saying in Philippians 3:13-14.

Let me put it up from the paraphrase called The Message.

Philippians 3:13–14 (The Message)
13 Friends, don’t get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I’ve got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus.
14 I’m off and running, and I’m not turning back.

 
Wherever you’re at today, wherever your children are at and whether you have physical children or spiritual children… you have the opportunity to act like a dad – take it!

So, in 1 Thessalonians Chapter 2, Paul is reminding the church of how he treated the “child-like” believers in the church at Thessalonica and in these verses is a great picture of what it looks like when we choose to act like a dad.

Look at 1 Thessalonians 2:11.

1 Thessalonians 2:11 (NLT)
11 And you know that we treated each of you as a father treats his own children.

 
This is why if you have no physical children, this still applies to you because Paul applied this to his “spiritual children.”
So, the focus of these verses (10, 11, 12) is what it looked like when Paul was “acting like a dad” to these new believers. That is our connection.

And here are the two great truths in these three verses about what it looks like to act like a dad.

First, Paul reviews his character (who he was) toward these spiritual children.
Second, Paul reviews his actions (how he acted) toward his spiritual children.
 
First, we’ll look at the character of a dad toward his children. The definition of the word CHARACTER – the moral qualities of an individual. And we find the moral qualities of a godly dad one verse up, in verse 10 and I’m actually going to use the ESV here so we can look closely at these words. This is Paul’s character – who he was to his spiritual children.

1 Thessalonians  2:10 (ESV)
10 You are witnesses, and God also, how HOLY and RIGHTEOUS and BLAMELESS was our conduct toward you believers.


These are huge words of character and as dads our character (who we are) is everything!

And as Paul says, as a spiritual father, his character was:
1) Holy
2) Righteous
3) Blameless

Now, right away, this sends all dads into complete failure mode! If I have to be holy, righteous, and blameless I might as well give up right now!

But… quit whining for a minute. God has given us the power and the ability to have this level of character in our lives. These are the steps that we can begin to take for our children today.

Let’s look closely at these three words.

#1) (Paul says) Our conduct was holy toward you.
The word here means: “To be dedicated (set apart) to God.” You and I cannot be holy in the sense of “sinless.” But you can be dedicated to God – on behalf of your children.

You can be set apart to God on behalf of your children. The question is – will you choose to be? Because there are children watching you, either physical children or spiritual children and they are following in your steps. So, #1 – We must be dedicated (set apart) to God.

#2) (Paul says) Our conduct was righteous toward you.

The word used here mean simply “Do what is right.” It is a “practical righteousness”. We must choose to do what is right.

If you want to act like a godly dad then – do what is right. Especially in the face of hardship and difficulty. Especially when the chips are down or the deck is stacked against you. Do what is right! Because your children are watching and they will walk in your steps. Dad, it is our character that our children are following. It is who you are that will become – who they are.
 
So, #1) We must be dedicated to God (Holy)
and #2) We must do what is right – (live “rightly”)

#3) (Paul says verse 10) Our conduct was blameless toward you.

This word means simply: “Free of guilt.” It doesn’t mean perfect or sinless. But it does mean living right (with no guilt of sin).
And the word carries with it not bringing shame on Jesus or yourself and the number one thing that brings shame on Jesus and yourself is hidden sin.
 
Is it possible for a godly dad to live right – with NO hidden sin? YES – it absolutely is possible and God has given you the same power that raised Jesus from the dead to enable you to “act like a godly dad.”

So – dad –

IF you’re NOT - Living DEDICATED to God
IF you’re NOT – Doing What is RIGHT
IF you’re NOT – Living FREE of Guilt


Then - - REPENT – (Stop AND Turn from Sin)

And be truly transformed
by truly surrendering to Jesus Christ
and truly making Jesus your Lord.

And then, (prayerfully) your kids will say, Yeah, there was a time when my dad didn’t really live like a godly dad – but then – Jesus changed his life.
 
And listen, please, none of us can do this perfectly and God knows that full well. But, can your kids say, “My dad’s not perfect, but my dad is dedicated to God, does his best to do what’s right and he would not bring shame on Jesus – or himself.”

If your kids cannot say that about you today, then you have an opportunity for a great turn-around story. All you have to do is fully surrender to Jesus and become a full-time disciple of Jesus and allow him to turn you into a godly dad.

So, Paul gives us three character traits that we are to be for the benefit of our children. And now three things we are called to do (actions) for the benefit of our children.

Continuing in 1 Thessalonians 2:11-12.

1 Thessalonians 2:11-12 – ESV
11 For you know how, like a father with his children,
12 we EXHORTED each one of you and ENCOURAGED you and CHARGED you to walk in a manner worthy of God, who calls you into his own kingdom and glory.


#1) Paul says a father is to exhort his children.

The Greek word is not far from the word used for the Holy Spirit. For the Holy Spirit, the Greek word is PARAKLETOS. This word for “exhort” is PARAKALEO. It means literally “To call to one’s side, to support, encourage or console.” It also means “to admonish, or beseech.”

Those are a lot of action words all describing what we are called to do for our children.

We are to call our children to our side…
to support, encourage, or console them
and to admonish and beseech them.

But always remember, first – we call them “to our side.” We call them to come alongside of us.

#2) Paul says (verse 12) a father encourages his children.

Exhort and encourage are actually similar words. They both include the idea of comfort and consolation.

I know, you thought comfort and consolation was “mom’s job” (and too often it is). But I cannot convey to you the power to a child of a father comforting and consoling and encouraging them.

Dad – are you speaking to your children in a comforting, consoling, encouraging way. I promise you… it goes a long, long way.

So, Paul says we exhort, we encourage and then

#3) Paul says a father charges his children.

This word means “to declare, beseech, exhort SOLEMNLY.”

You know those conversations – those solemn ones? My kids still tell me I have a solemn conversation voice. And when I slip into it, the air gets thick and everyone gets a little nervous and they can tell I’m going into this type of talk.
And, what is it that we are to solemnly declare to our kids? Exactly what verse 12 says. We are to solemnly charge them – to walk in a manner worthy of God.
 
We are to exhort, encourage and charge our children to walk in a manner worthy of God. But, is that possible if WE are not walking in a manner worthy of God? We must first BE, then we can TEACH. And far and away our character (who we are) is our loudest lesson our children will hear.

And again, if we are not walking in a manner worthy of God (ourselves) then let’s repent to God and our children and let’s show them how Jesus can truly transform a life.
 
So, Dads – First, Let’s:
1) Be Dedicated to God
2) Be Committed to doing what's Right
3) Not bring shame on Christ, or ourselves

THEN we Can:
1) Exhort
2) Encourage
3) Charge - Our children . . .
to walk in a manner worthy of God - - - AMEN?

So, let me give you some practical direction on how you can begin to act like a godly dad.

First, you, dad, have got to have a real, daily relationship with Jesus Christ.
1) Praying always
2) Reading His Word
3) and actually Following what He says


And if it takes you your entire life to show your children that you have that relationship then it will be a life well lived.

Then, while you are developing that real, daily relationship with Jesus Christ, learn to use the storehouse of wisdom that is in God’s Word. I know the Bible seems like a big, intimidating book, but if you will commit to dig out the wisdom that is stored in there for you to be a godly dad, God’s Word – within a real relationship with Jesus Christ – will transform you.

Get into a discipleship group with two or three other dads and commit to apply the wisdom of God’s Word to this area of your lives. And ask us, and we will help you.

You have to first Start LIVING IT

1) Be Dedicated to God
2) Be Committed to doing what's Right
3) and Not bring shame on the cause of Christ


THEN - you can Start TEACHING IT

1) Exhort
2) Encourage
3) Charge - your kids - to walk in a manner worthy of God